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Abolish Ideologies
of Ownership

Hierarchical Relationships
Collective Trauma

Capitalism assigns value through scarcity.


I mean, just take diamonds, for example.


The diamond industry locks diamonds away in vaults so they can induce a state of scarcity. 


Because restricting the supply makes the price go up.


Low availability = high value.


For example, are we noticing how we're relying on scarcity to determine the value of our personal relationships?

As a collective, we follow an unspoken rule that limits the role of sex and romance to only one person at any given time.

And because there can only be one person fulfilling this role, we subconsciously rank sexual/romantic relationships as the number one priority in our lives.

Remember, low availability = high value.


Within this scarcity paradigm, our world narrows in to revolve around our chosen sexual/romantic partner.

And we're not convinced our relationship is secure unless we're constantly escalating the degrees of enmeshment.

We share a bed, a house, a “couple” identity (“he completes me”), finances, and even DNA (making babies).


But what if relationship security wasn't wrapped up in these external structures?

And if our survival needs weren't so deeply invested in these structures, what space for authenticity might that open up?

How might our internal sense of freedom expand?




What if our sense of safety was rooted in real trust – not the kind that comes from outside ourselves, but from within?

What if authenticity didn’t risk our safety, but was at the core of it?

How might that change our daily experience of relating?

Dare we say "yes" to more more ease, more pleasure? (not just the sexual kind)

Less strategizing about which parts of ourselves to filter out or manipulate so we don't rock the boat and risk our survival needs.


This blog invites us to heal from the trauma-response of seeking safety through scarcity

so that we can seek safety through abundance.


When the systems that shape our lives are rooted in scarcity,

how are we supposed to notice when scarcity creeps into

our most intimate relationships?

In a world that demands we compete against each other to access resources,

how does reducing our safety alliances into teams of two

reinforce this scarcity narrative?



→ By exploring the ways Cultures of War have quietly shaped our social norms and infiltrated our most beloved relationships (through social phenomenons like mono-normativity, the nuclear family, relationship escalator, and so much more).

By inviting us to remember the Cultures of Care our ancestors have practiced long before the trauma of Imperialism erased our collective memory.


We'll explore (seemingly unrelated) questions, like... 

•  How does a history of Imperialism create challenges when we attempt to navigate conflict today?

•  How do hierarchical ways of relating create barriers to our sexual pleasure?

•  What does the looming “not enoughness” we feel in our love lives (whether we’re married, single or     otherwise) have to do with the climate collapse?


and so much more!​


This blog is for people who, not only believe it's possible to live more truthfully and abundantly,

but who know it's necessary for our individual and collective survival.

This blog is for people who want to cultivate real trust, not the superficial kind that we learn from

Cultures of War.

The kind of trust that lies within.

The kind you can bring with you no matter who you're with or where you go.

Proceed with courage, compassion, and curiosity.


Thanks for bein' here 😊

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